[Fedoras of Salvation] - White Knights ITT

[Lightning_Dolt]

No, it's not an auto-loss, but I'm sure you can see his point: winning the game on the backs of a ping-stick and a few 1/1 tokens is not the easiest thing in the world.

Though the deck probably has enough CA and removal to still make a game of it.

That was kind of what I was getting at.

I'm going to jump on the drooling over the Rakdos champion wagon too. Wow.

Also, fuck azorius. Why does wizards think they need to be the best deck in standard?

Seriously, since 2009 U/Wx has been the best or barely second best deck in standard. Why does wizards feel the need to suck the dick of these players?

Sure, we have shifts between aggro, control, and midrange, but u/w gets the lion's share of the broken things and can play all three
strategies.

Oh, red is getting too good, let's print some pro red shit. Oh, and when we design cards, let's not think about the existing cards they'll combo with (restoration angel)

Are red mages just not vocal enough? I suspect something more sinistar.

I think red card design is part of their marketing strategy. They make it good enough for tier 1.5-2, and mostly commons / uncommons so budget players / new players think magic is affordable. They then print hate cards and/or make it underpower just enough that you have to get a new deck / splash other colours if you want to win big events once you're hooked. RDW is a gateway drug. Eventually you build up a tollerance and move on to more expensive ways to get your rush (like a bunch of u/w mythics ).

Sorry about your lady LP. Back
to admiring redthirst's dick with the rest of the rabble.

[Alex]

Being testing a lot of the mono black vampire deck. Realised that the bad cards were the vampires, and that the control shell was really good.

I'd probably still play Vampire Nighthawk, sometimes in a shell like this you'll just resolve him and then beat them down over the course of a few turns, which seems like it would smooth everything out.

I like Nighthawk
too, but I think here he'd rather just be casting Tribute on turn three. It basically does the same thing Nighthawk does, which is gain you life and kill a creature. For the late game, I can see it serving as an extra threat, but he already has Lingering Souls, Staff of Win, and Obzedat to take care of that.

Also Bloodgift Demon seems good in some number. I get that they die to Mutilate, but honestly just 1 or 2 turns with Bloodgift out puts you pretty far ahead on its own.

Staff of Nin fills that slot and bypasses mainboard removal. It also pings for one and doesn't cost you one life every turn if you want to be the one drawing the card.

After playing mobo black infect for a LONG time, I can tell you that none of these things matter. In mono black you can absolutely just resolve one dorky guy and play a crapload of removal and just win because your opponent essentially can't keep a dude alive long enough to block it.
It worked for Phyrexian Crusader, solo Lashwrithe germ tokens, Obliterator, etc.

Tribute doesn't hit people in the face, is what I'm getting at.

[hamfactorial]

What went down, LK?

[redthirst]

Sorry about your girl, LP.

I figured she was crazy when you said she was a girl, but I didn't want to say anything.

[Valdarith]

Being testing a lot of the mono black vampire deck. Realised that the bad cards were the vampires, and that the control shell was really good.

I'd probably still play Vampire Nighthawk, sometimes in a shell like
this you'll just resolve him and then beat them down over the course of a few turns, which seems like it would smooth everything out.

I like Nighthawk too, but I think here he'd rather just be casting Tribute on turn three. It basically does the same thing Nighthawk does, which is gain you life and kill a creature. For the late game, I can see it serving as an extra threat, but he already has Lingering Souls, Staff of Win, and Obzedat to take care of that.

Also Bloodgift Demon seems good in some number. I get that they die to Mutilate, but honestly just 1 or 2 turns with Bloodgift out puts you pretty far ahead on its own.

Staff of Nin fills that slot and bypasses mainboard removal. It also pings for one and doesn't cost you one life every turn if you want to be the one drawing the card.

After playing mobo black infect for a LONG time, I can tell you that none of these things matter. In mono black
you can absolutely just resolve one dorky guy and play a crapload of removal and just win because your opponent essentially can't keep a dude alive long enough to block it. It worked for Phyrexian Crusader, solo Lashwrithe germ tokens, Obliterator, etc.

Tribute doesn't hit people in the face, is what I'm getting at.

I get that, but I just feel like Lingering Souls and Obzedat fill that role well enough.

What do you take out to shove Nighthawk in? Does he make the deck better?

[photodyer]

I need to catch up on the thread after being away from several days, but it turns out my lady was crazy and we split this morning.

Sorry, my brother...that sucks. Windstrider and I would be happy to send you out an "I've been with crazy" T-shirt...we bought them in bulk.

All bull aside, are you okay? Crazy can bring about all sorts of nasty inward thinking...

[Alex]

[card]Curse of Death's Hold[/card] is pretty mediocre, easily the worst card in the list. Literally the only relevance it has is "you won't die to dork dork dork craterhoof now," which seems like a bad reason to play it.

[LP, of the Fires]

Lets just talk about last night.

We hang out, we eat, shit's going good. Go to her place, watch a movie, make out a little, still good. At some point she wants to know my dating history so I tell her about some of my ex's. She decides that I settle for women because all the girls I've had relationships with made the first move.

Then I mention that I was actually in love with my last gf and she wants to know about that. I tell her it's personally and I don't want to talk about it. She flips shit because apparently she should be privy to all my present and past personal information. She basically says "fuck this I'm going to sleep, this is bullshit," at like 1AM. We go to sleep, her in her bed, me on her floor(which is fine). Then in the middle of the night at around 5 she wakes up all hot and bothered and wants me to jump in the sack with her. I'm like...I'd rather sleep and talk tomorrow. She was really
adamant so we proceed to get busy.

In the middle of sex she says something fucking weird like "are you gonna leave me after you fuck me" which threw me off, but I of course say no cause I did like her. Things are going whatever, we talk afterwards, go to bed.

We wake up at around 7 because she has work in the morning. I'm laying down getting rest while she's doing her business. She like straddles me while I'm covered up and tries to be sexual but I'm like...we did that, I'm resting before I have to go into the bright sun and then make my way home. Then she tells me I must be Bi. Cause I like asses, I want to try anal one day, and I doggy style is my favorite position. I figured those people where just normal men. But whatever. And then after we're both ready for work, she says she's not sure if it's going to work out or if we should even keep seeing each other. I responded with "I'm leaving before I say fucked up things. Have a good day at work."

Maybe I'm actually
the one being irrational, but I don't think I want to continue dating her after she went through all those stages in a eight hour period. I get that she hasn't done anything like...Jerry/Dan's lady level of crazy or anything, but I'm not interested in sticking around and finding out with someone who's so schizophrenic with there desires.

[hamfactorial]

All that weirdness is just how she gets herself wet. Don't worry about it if you're just looking to bang. Doesn't sound like stable girlfriend potential though.

I'm personally a little bit bi, but only for redthirst.

[Dodger]

Yeah bitch is weird.Not serious relationship material. Those bitches are only good for a fuck.

My girl brought some lube last night. Fun was had.

[Calamity]

She sounded jealous to me. I agree with Ham's assessment.


And if liking asses and related activities makes you gay...well I guess I'm pretty gay.

[Alex]

Lets just talk about last night.

We hang out, we eat, shit's going good. Go to her place, watch a movie, make out a little, still good. At some point she wants to know my dating history so I tell her about some of my ex's. She decides that I settle for women because all the girls I've had relationships with made the first move.

Then I mention that I was actually in love with my last gf and she wants to know about that. I tell her it's personally and I don't want to talk about it. She flips shit because apparently she should be privy to all my present and past personal information. She basically says "fuck this I'm going to sleep, this is bullshit," at like 1AM. We go to sleep, her in her bed, me on her floor(which is fine). Then in
the middle of the night at around 5 she wakes up all hot and bothered and wants me to jump in the sack with her. I'm like...I'd rather sleep and talk tomorrow. She was really adamant so we proceed to get busy.

In the middle of sex she says something fucking weird like "are you gonna leave me after you fuck me" which threw me off, but I of course say no cause I did like her. Things are going whatever, we talk afterwards, go to bed.

We wake up at around 7 because she has work in the morning. I'm laying down getting rest while she's doing her business. She like straddles me while I'm covered up and tries to be sexual but I'm like...we did that, I'm resting before I have to go into the bright sun and then make my way home. Then she tells me I must be Bi. Cause I like asses, I want to try anal one day, and I doggy style is my favorite position. I figured those people where just normal men. But whatever. And then after we're both ready for work, she says she's not sure if it's going to
work out or if we should even keep seeing each other. I responded with "I'm leaving before I say fucked up things. Have a good day at work."

Maybe I'm actually the one being irrational, but I don't think I want to continue dating her after she went through all those stages in a eight hour period. I get that she hasn't done anything like...Jerry/Dan's lady level of crazy or anything, but I'm not interested in sticking around and finding out with someone who's so schizophrenic with there desires.

Is she a ginger? I bet she's a ginger.

[redthirst]

All that weirdness is just how she gets herself wet. Don't worry about it if you're just looking to bang. Doesn't sound like stable girlfriend potential though.

I'm personally a little bit bi, but only for redthirst.

That's actually a legitimate exemption listed in the LGBT Community Handbook.

So you're fine.

[LP, of the Fires]

I plan on cutting ties completely. I will be sticking my dick elsewhere.

And no, she's not a ginger. Black girl from Compton.

[Khaospawn]

Sorry to hear that, LP.

[Alex]

I recently came to the realization that all gingers are exactly the same, and that sounds like some gingery shit to me.

I'm only dating brunettes from here on out.

[windstrider]

LP, if you're feeling that it's time to get away, then trust those instincts and get away. No need to second guess yourself on this one. Someone who can't respect boundaries is not someone you want to be with. Doesn't matter if she's the level of crazy that Jerry and I experienced.

[redthirst]

Pro Tip: Only date Asian chicks.

[Alex]

One day I will tell you guys about my crazy ex. I still have the scars!

[photodyer]

Lets just talk about last night.

Maybe I'm actually the one being irrational, but I don't think I want to continue dating her after she went through all those stages in a eight hour period. I get that she hasn't done anything like...Jerry/Dan's lady level of crazy or anything, but I'm not interested in sticking around and finding out with someone who's so schizophrenic with there desires.

That's what I'm talking about LK...when they get you to wondering if you're the problem after doing totally irrational shit, run the hell away. Seriously...Dan and I haven't gone through complete histories, but I'm gonna bet that his ex wasn't totally off the deep end when he met her. Rather, she likely chameleoned into what he wanted
because keeping a guy around is paramount. The real crazy builds over time...they push until you start to balk, then either make nice or make you think you're the problem and that they should leave and all the sudden you're backpedaling and trying to appease them. It turns your head inside-out.

I'm not going to start in with seeing borderlines around every corner, but some of what you describe sounds way too familiar. Feeling threatened by past people in your life, trying to instill doubt in you about your orientation, then dropping the "break up" threat at you after she spent the night being swingy...them's borderline tendencies.

Again, LK, sorry that things went south...I really wonder what we have to do to find people that can stand living in their own skins and don't have to take everything to Bizarro World.

EDIT: Excuse my sleepless ramblings...Dan said everything I
was trying to much better and in many, many fewer words!

[hamfactorial]

If anyone has a ginger they're looking to trade in, let me know. I have about a decade of redhead training under my belt and would love to tune a few back up to racing form.

[redthirst]

The crazy doesn't come all at once - they feed it to you in little bits so it's more palatable.

They make sure you like them enough that you'll write off their craziness as "cute" or "quirky" until it gets to the point that you can't really write it off anymore.

Nah, man... be glad you met this one now instead of when she's older and knows how to hide it better.

[photodyer]

If anyone has a ginger they're looking to trade in, let me know. I have about a decade of redhead training under my belt and would love to tune a few back up to racing form.

No. Effing. Way. I don't hate anybody that much, and I love you, brother ham. I wouldn't point mine in your direction for a truckload of mint Power Nines...


Ahem....No homo.

[Alex]

If anyone has a ginger they're looking to trade in, let me know. I have about a decade of redhead training under my belt and would love to tune a few back up to racing form.

A brother in arms!

The last one was by far the worst. I draw the line at bodily harm, in which I suffered a few pretty serious stab wounds. That's when you total the project and buy yourself a new frame, I think.

[photodyer]

The crazy doesn't come all at once - they feed it to you in little bits so it's more palatable.

They make sure you like them enough that you'll write off their craziness as "cute" or "quirky" until it gets to the point that you can't really write it off anymore.

Nah, man... be glad you met this one now instead of when she's older and knows how to hide it better.

And again, redthirst, you hit right to the heart of it...outstanding description of the descent into Oz.

Seriously...I think you, Dan and I need to author a book on the subject.

[rcwraspy]

Watch out for her calls wanting to make up. This sounds very familiar, and in my situation it resulted in about a year of being broken up during the week and together not seeing the light of day during the weekend. She could hide her crazy for about a 48 hour period then it all came spilling out.

[LP, of the Fires]

Thanks for the advice guys. I'm ending that shit. I really don't want to be caught up by anything scandalous. Redthirst pretty much crystalized everything for me and I'm just hopping off that train. Jerry, Dan, Ham, Khaos, Alex, and all the rest, you guys are great.

[redthirst]

All the girlies say I'm pretty fly for a white guy.

[windstrider]

The last one was by far the worst. I draw the line at bodily harm, in which I suffered a few pretty serious stab wounds. That's when you total the project and buy yourself a new frame, I think.

[
And again, redthirst, you hit right to the heart of it...outstanding description of the descent into Oz.

Seriously...I think you, Dan and I need to author a book on the subject.

It sounds like we should include Alex in on that as well.

In my case, though, after she attacked me, my ex slashed one of my friends with a razor blade.

[redthirst]

Well... "Bitches be crazy" didn't become such a popular saying because it was so ironical.

Also, let's go ahead and keep a seat open for Kaze - he'll know what we're talking about in a few years or so.

[Aesnath]

On the subject of the Az champ: I'm just sick of them printing things that make Resto even more busted. Moreover, why the pro-red, there are like two damn spells that could have killed it and that was too much? Moreover, most the champs aren't that great, why is this one so potent?

@Z: The standard deck I've been running is W/B. I think it is worth considering Sorin if you need a CA engine/alternate kill. Moreover, I've had OK success with Barter in Blood, depending on if you need more sweeper-ish cards. I may just throw together your list and see how it goes.

[Alex]

She attempted to go at me with a knife, but I grew up in the ghetto so I learned at a pretty young age how to disarm somebody. Despite that, I still got my arms cut up pretty badly in the process. Funny enough, I was wearing a leather riding jacket, so you can imagine how much of a struggle that was. She was a tough girl though, she worked for Medieval Times as a knight, so she was trained in all that Renaissance nonsense and could probably bench more than most of the people in this thread.

Funny ending to the story, after I wrestled the knife away, she tried to throw a punch at me, which I stepped out of the way of. She hit the refrigerator behind me, breaking both of her middle knuckles on her right hand, and then when the police showed up and she tried to cry self defense, they were like "Ma'am, there are dents here that show you were the attacker." Our kitchen was a pretty narrow little area, and the fridge
was at the end, meaning I was the one backed into the corner.

But I was attacking her. To make a long story short she spent 6 months to a year in a mental institution after everything was said and done. I didn't even have to press charges.

[redthirst]

Crazy bitch sex, though...

amirite?

[Alex]

Crazy bitch sex, though...

amirite?

Basically all day err day. I mean, we were 18 and we lived in suburban North Carolina, there was nothing else to do...

[hamfactorial]

Man, I feel like I've been playing in the minors compared to the crazy you guys have dealt with.

[Alex]

I've only really had the one REALLY bad one. My ex wife was a ginger too and she was pretty sane overall. Maybe a little too in love with Disney, but on the grand scale that's pretty minor.

[Dane]

I know it's already been covered, and I've said it before, but I think it was on Sally...

I do now, always have, and always will maintain that insanity is a symptom of possessing two x chromosomes.

[LP, of the Fires]

I personally think my girl is just to immature to handle a relationship. Which is odd considering she's 3 years older then me but whatever. She was upset that I wouldn't say I love her. After we were dating for 3 weeks. Really?

I'm really pissed off that she was trying to set me up as the victimizer because she didn't want to be fucked then left and that's exactly what she ended up doing to me. After she drops my beer off today, deleting her number.

On to the next one.

[rcwraspy]

These newly spoiled cards make me want to brew a really bad post-rotation Jund list.

1-drops
Dork
Slitherhead

2-drops
Gyre Sage
Farseek
Something (EDIT: Skarrg Guildmage?)

3-drops
??

4-drops
Exava
Rubblebelt Raiders

Curve-topper
Ruric Thar

[redthirst]

After she drops my beer off today, deleting her number.